Wednesday, November 30, 2005

I thought my mom was the only one

I love my mom. We actually get along quite well. She is cool and nice.


She continues to email me with bad news rather than giving me a call. And my bad news I mean
  • Bailey (the family cat we had 10 years) died last night.
  • Your Grandma W fell and is in the hospital. She might be ok.

Each time I get an email like this, I call her and say "MOM - please don't do that - give me a call instead to tell me bad news". Her reasoning for why she emails isn't as bad as you'd think - she gets up at the crack of dawn and sits down online to get news and do email. I honestly can say I'm glad that when the cat died I didn't get a 5:15am phone call - that would've sucked a lot. But I'd love if 7am or 8am or 9am meant bad news phone calls instead of checking a bad news email.

The reason I brought this up is that I was reading a girl's blog and she blogged about her mom doing the same thing - bad news emails. Her mom sent her a subject: "Grandma" email and a week later she was at her grandma's funeral. Mom - please don't make me have to blog that story someday...

They're not kidding

ugly, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

The world's ugliest dog died at age 14. Seriously, this could give me nightmares.

Thanks Carson!

Carson Daly turned on our friend Earl to karma.

He turned me on to the Golf Digest's Hollywood Top 100 golfers. Interesting.

Though I must say that if everyone that contributed any effort toward making an end of the year "top" list would put that time/money/effort toward solving major world problems, I think we'd get somewhere with that stuff.

Any comments regarding the power of bloggers turning to solving world problems instead of wasting precious moments of life doing this will be deleted.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Better late than never

I was in St. Louis for work Oct 18-22 and am just posting the picture now - my bad. I thought I'd throw these out before I leave bloggerland for a few days - I'm not bringing my computer with to Vegas so I'll have to blog when I get back on Tuesday and will hopefully post fun Vegas pix next week. I'll try not to suck at belated picture posting.

Fun pictures from the week include visiting the Arch, and many from Trivia Night. One of my favorite parts of Trivia night was the heads/tails contest. Since the evening was a fundraiser, they would collect $1 from everyone who wanted to participate. Then we would all stand up, and pick either heads/heads, heads/tails, or tails/tails -- indicated by putting our hands on our ass and/or head. Then, they'd flip 2 coins and announce the combo. If you were correct, you stayed standing and stayed in the game. If you were wrong, you were out like in dodgeball.

After 3-4-5-6 rounds, there would be last man standing who'd gotten the flips right each time and they walked away with 50% of the pot, the fundraiser kept the other 50%. Good times had by all, I kid you not.

Best Sink Ever

IMG_6754, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

In the Renissance Grand hotel in St. Louis, this was the sink in my room. I thought it was one of the most user friendly and pretty sinks I'd seen in a while - a Kohler if I remember correctly. Those 'Sconnies know how to make a sink.

Friday afternoon

IMG_6762, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I got done with work early so I met up with Matt after the brewery tour. We hit up the Arch - I'd give it 2 thumbs up. The underground museum was nice, and the ride up to the top was outstanding - a little creepy and ferris wheel-ish but quite nice. And the view from the top - even though it was cloudier than I remember, was good - I learned where Clayton was, and we realized there's jack crap on the IL side of the river.

Can't really tell we're in front of the Arch

IMG_6764, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

L-R: Damon, gf Katie, Matt, me

No thank you

IMG_6767, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Prior to trivia night, we grabbed food at a bar in a strip mall right NEXT to Lucky House. I love that it features two types of ethnic food on the sign out front, and that someone I talked to later in the night, had eaten there and said it wasn't bad. Awesome.

Welcome to Trivia Night!

IMG_6768, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I'll try not to bore you with details, but I think Trivia Night St. Louis style is the best idea ever. This was a fundraiser for a club soccer team and as you can see, there's a stage in front, scorekeepers sit up there and tally scores, and approximately 30 teams of 8 people each play trivia. This multiple-choice format sucked, but it was still a good time. Entry was $20/person and you got a chance to win door prizes and prizes for top teams, plus DRANK FREE BEER ALL NIGHT. Good times.

Smile, team!

IMG_6770, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Here's a mostly complete picture of our team - a couple of the individual team member mug shots that turned out well will follow.

Team member Matt

IMG_6781, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Happy to be playing. Also during the evening, Matt made side bets with the loser getting slapped in the face by a piece of salami (or some other sliced, processed meat). If I could figure out how to post video on my blog, you could see it in action.

Team member Laura

IMG_6785, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I think I had too many Bud Lights by this point in the night. I was a good scribe for trivia. (I think?)

Team member Rummel

IMG_6780, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

He was a good contributor to the team, especially regarding an answer about a synonym of the word "red" that he knew from playing a video game. He did not play well with team pictures.

Team member Tutle (Turdell)

IMG_6779, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Juice's work friend. He was drunk.

I really like your mustache

IMG_6790, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Unfortunately, Alicia wasn't in the house to congratulate this man on his mustache. I didn't actually make a comment on his mustache, but did want to capture it.

So I introduced myself and asked for him to pose in a picture with me, found out his name was Louis FROM St. Louis, and here you go. Our photo.

Playing with the Log-o-Beef

IMG_6796, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

For trivia night, you bring munchies for your table to snack on. Someone from our table brought Schnuck's (a grocery chain) Log-o-Beef. It never got eaten, but we had lots of fun posing with it. It even came out bar hopping with us after trivia night, and surprise, ended up in Minneapolis. So if we're looking for a big night, I'll throw the sausage in my purse and make a night of it.

Turtle (Turdell) played with the Log-o-Beef

IMG_6799, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Jenny played with the Log-o-Beef

IMG_6801, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Matt played with the Log-o-Beef

IMG_6802, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Strangest thing I saw

IMG_6809, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

At the second to last bar of the evening, I saw this coupon, soaked in water in the Ladies' bathroom next to the sink. It was so strange that someone's clipped coupon ended up here I took a picture. I'm not sure why but of course, I'm sharing it.

Another one bites the dust

IMG_6811, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

If I'd just implement one of my business plans before seeing it action on the "street" I'd be a happier, richer woman. I blogged about this idea in March and have seen it in DFW but now it's here, too. Upon landing in Minneapolis, I saw this hair salon in MSP airport which features mani/pedi. Damn them.


definition: When you're sitting in the library, doing work. You turn on itunes so you can listen to music - your headphones are plugged in and you're enjoying 50 Cent's P.I.M.P. when Alicia turns to tell you "IT'S ON OUT HERE!" and you realize your headphones were only half plugged in and you're a white girl that's been blaring P.I.M.P. all up in the library. Embarrassing.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Thanks Zach!

The video blog on Zach Braff's blog gives an update on Scrubs - unfortunately, it's not really a firm update. Basically, Zach says NBC held off on premiering Scrubs this season b/c they wanted to make room for My Name is Earl and The Office. Two of my favorite shows, but this doesn't excuse "bumping" Scrubs. Zach says the rumor is that Scrubs will be back in January, but it's not confirmed. His blog is fun - I will check it for updates.

Vegas Weather Forecast

Hopefully, this will come true:

Thursday high of 71
Friday high of 71
Saturday high of 64
Sunday high of 55
Monday high of 57

If I were smart I could put a picture of this beautiful forecast on my blog but it's not happening.

Movie releases

This blog posting shows a good schedule of 2006 and 2007 major movie releases, several of which look interesting. I like the idea of a documentary about the Back to the Future trilogy, as well as Passion of the Clerks.

Monday, November 21, 2005

And I thought I knew beer

In Milwaukee last week, I had a new beer - Oscar's Chocolate Oatmeal Stout. It was outstanding - made me remember how much I like the Town Hall's Oatmeal Stout. Oscar's Stour is made by the Sand Creek Brewery in Black River Falls, WI and they have several other beers that sound quite nice.

I like to think of myself as a beer connaisseur - and one who posesses much beer trivia. But to have this brewery practically in my backyard (and in the same city as one of my favorite rest stops on I-94) made me quite disappointed in myself. Their website gives scant details about distribution - they have special events from GB to Madison to Janesville to Rochester - so I'm guessing they're not in Mpls... But I emailed them to inquire and, as usual, will give you an update :)

Georgia, Georgia, my home sweet home

I saw an ad in Mpls/St. Paul Magazine for a class about Georgia O'Keefe in Feb-Mar. Fun - I could learn about an artist I don't know much about - in fact I JUST learned what her paintings looks like... I just looked up the website to register and found out, oh, the class is $724. Nevermind.

On a related subject, this blog about a O'Keefe-ish pink flamingo is humorous.

Word of the Day

Otolaryngology. My grandma saw one for years and always just called him an ear, nose and throat doctor.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Quiz time

I enjoyed this OK Cupid politcal quiz (remember these from the first half of college?) that rates you on your political views. While I was not surprised by the results, I did like how the quiz showed you where you fall against famous people, and gave a few other results that I thought were interesting. Check it.

The top of the Rockefeller Center

IMG_6847, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

It just opened Nov 1, we visited on the 10th. Needless to say, visiting a tourist attraction shortly after it opens is a GOOD idea. An advantage over visiting the top of the Empire State Building (aside from the maze-like line in the basement which makes you nauseous) - the Rockefeller Center blocks the view of Central Park from the Empire State Building. Rockefeller was quite sly - building up and blocking the Empire's view.

The ladies

IMG_6857, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

From the Top of the Rock.

View o' the Park

IMG_6862, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

From the Top of the Rock, possible the best tourist trip I've hit in years.

Just a few steps from Club Shelter

IMG_6888, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I saw this sign and thought it was frickin hilarious. I know Mathattan is different than the rest of the world, it is special. Ex. you can order a book online and have it delivered in an hour to your apartment, and you can live in the city 25 years and still not afford to buy a place.

Another reason it is "different" - you can get surgery in places with signs like the one pictures. Yipee.

It's hot it's here it's now

IMG_6890, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

This picture was one of approximately 82 I took of Michael and/or Glenn Friday night after the Out 100 party. I felt this one summed up the evening -Michael being bossy, and Glenn leaning in front and center.

As seen in my sister's apartment entry

IMG_6924, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Erica's building is not not ghetto. Please note the use of double negatives in the previous sentence.

As seen in Seinfeld

IMG_6934, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Missy posed for a quick picture in front of Tom's Restaurant near Columbia University.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

A moment of silence

IMG_6936, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

For Missy's dearly (ok not dearly) departed boots. They were falling apart and while we did our best to buy her new ones in NYC, we failed to find ones to buy. Missy is diligently shopping in SF for new boots (maybe Marc can help her? or Robyn?) and w/ all the stuff she bought in NYC, these didn't fit in her suitcase on the way home. Unfortunately. They were left in NY and donated to a clothing shelter.

Visiting the Gug

IMG_6938, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I took Sunday morning to take the train down to 86th street from Harlem (after eating an omlet at a cute restaurant in Harlem but learning that I didn't like goat cheese in omelets). I walked from 86th on the Upper West Side to the Guggenheim on the Upper East Side. It was so nice and so pretty.

Jackie's Reservoir

IMG_6941, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

Looking toward the Upper West Side.

Pizza at Lombardo's

IMG_6952, originally uploaded by lauraumn.

I had linner (lunch/dinner at 4pm) w/ my friend Kris (far left). We went to Lombardo's off Spring Street - the oldest pizzeria in the city. The pizza was good but I'm not convinced it was better than Pizzeria Regina in the North End in Boston. It was nice to see Kris and roommate Ida (can't WAIT for this year's xmas card from them) and their friends from school.


I'm back in WI for a few days. I flew in Thursday morning and did store visits in Kenosha and Milwaukee, and then Friday morning had a good meeting. I had some posters made for the meeting, and they were a big hit. Yeah me! Then, I took the Badger Bus from MKE - Madison for $19 in order to see Christina and stay w/ her for the weekend. Last night, we grabbed a few cheese curds as appetizers, then went to a dinner party.

Yes, a dinner party. Apparently this is the kind of things graduate students do... It was a fun group of about 15 people, mostly MBAers and JVs (Joint Ventures, what the spouses of MBAers are called). Funny. Dinner was good, I had mucho wine and told exaggerated, over the top stories (surprise) and when we got home we went to bed, at 11:30. We're either old, or ramping up for tonight's proposed case race. (I vote the latter).

Thursday, November 17, 2005


My sister had this perfume I want - it's in a frosty bottle, it's probably 7 inches tall, maybe 2 inches wide at the bottom and a triangle shape. I want to say it's named after a man, and one of the words starts with I and or M. There is also a man's cologne by the same designer.

Any guesses? If you can figure out what to keyword for google, you're a googod (that's google god).

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Ensemble casts

A few weeks ago I watched Can't Hardly Wait, an Alicia recommended ensemble cast movie. I think Turk's appearance really made it for me (where the F is Scrubs anyway????) - though the sister from Six Feet Under I also liked quite a bit.

It reminded me how much I really like - Love, Actually. Then I couldn't think of any other ensemble movies I've liked or seen at all. I know there are these types of movies all the time - I like them. Any other ensemble cast recommendations for me?

Word of the Day



The Beer Institue (not a joke) outlined new rules guiding what you can and can't do in beer ads. The Rocky Mountain News gives the details.

CB2 read my blog

CB2, a sister to Crate & Barrel, must've read my blog to figure out their next big idea - bed linens that work well for couples. aka not super girly or u-g-l-y like I blogged about 10 months ago. Certainly enough time for CB2 to read, get drawings together, and get factories set-up for production. I need to start my own damn business or sell my ideas instead of posting them online for all to take for $0. Damn CB2.

On a related note, who the F is CB2's target audience? Initially, I thought it was like Limited Too - not that it was for kids like Pottery Barn Kids, but that it was the "little sis" to the regular store - cheaper and for a younger audience, essentially. Apparently not the case, because stuff at the store is f-ing expensive.

Does this make CB2 the Banana Republic of Gap Companies? Please advise.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Don't tell...

I don't have a pet.

Until now.

Action required

I have a few rules about my blog:

  1. Don't write my name out so people can google me and find my blog.
  2. Don't write about work specifics (people get fired for that).
  3. Don't write about people at work that suck b/c if someone you work with down the line becomes your friend and you give them your blog address and they read a few months back they may find the mean thing you said.
  4. Don't write about people in a negative light when they could find out about your blog through someone you know and who may read your blog.

For this reason, rule #4 specifically, I can not blog about one of the funnier things I've found online. However, a simple email to me or comment on my blog will let me connect with you the funiness (word?) I found. Holla.


I love you VLOOKUP. You make me happy. You allow me to complete many work projects in 5-8 minutes when I would otherwise be completing them manually and not finishing before my 32nd birthday. That makes me happy.

I know I'm not a nerd, so I don't talk about boring things very much, but this one time, at a party at the Barn where boys lived in college, I started talking about VLOOKUP (maybe that's why I never got a boyfriend?) and Shane Hillsley knew what it was and echoed my praises for the Excel function.

Anybody else want to join the I LOVE VLOOKUP CLUB? Accounts, finance people perhaps? Maybe Christina or Zippy? Natalie #1? Ooh - Natalie #1 once upon a time introduced me to auto filter - it also rocks my world but not quite as much as the big V.

On the tip, I also heart Text to Columns. It's second cousins with the big V because you sometimes need it to do VLOOKUP.

Apparently, Linda Johnson, MOS also loves VLOOKUP.

Word of the Fall

The word of the summer was snarky.

The word of the fall is obviously. I can't stop using it - especially in work emails? It's only showed up in blog postings 17 times this year, which isn't very much, so apparently, my blog doesn't exactly reflect my linguistic habits.

Is linguistic the right word to use - or does that word only relate to verbal speech? I should ask one of "two people I know" (notice I didn't use "friends") going to grad school for speech pathology. Oh wait - does speech pathology deal w/ the word linguistic or just w/ kids that can't say Rs (Aviry Truhe, Sarah Parlanti, etc.)?

I'm unable to use good reason or judgement today. Note to self - don't go out drinking tonight.

Am I crazy or is he a product whore?

I had talked in August about the guy in the David Spade Capital One commercial, who I think is also in the Pringles commercial where the customer in the grocery store eats the Pringles can. No one commented to confirm or deny if this was true, or to call me crazy.

So last night, I watch this cheesy-ass commerical for a car rental company - I'll call it Enterprise but I can't confirm or deny if that's the right one (NICE AD - no recollection of brand name). There's a guy that's a loser and rents a NICE car from unmemorable rental car company. Then, when he shows up at his 10 year reunion, all the ladies are like "Wow, you've really done well for yourself, Moose". I remember his nickname but not the brand.

I swear it's the same unnamed actor - Capital One plus Pringles + rental car company. And at least 2/3 are focused on him not being a non-descript actor. Quit whoring around, Mister. It's pissing me off.

I tried googling for his name and pix b/c obviously it would make this posting better, but I failed. Anybody has success they get $1.

I bet either Heidi or Bejota wins, they seem to be the best at these tests of true friendship tasks.

UPDATE: Thank you, new best friend Della, for confirming product whoring. Still don't know his name so you don't get $1. But I appreciate that you and Bubba also notice things like I do.

Flu (shot not bird)

8:30am today, this girl got her flu shot.

Just wondering, am I the only person under 80 that's not 1) my mom or 2) working in a place w/ sick/old people?


I don't really understand how the FURminator works. But I do think the name is funny, and that the website announces:

"Remove hair from your pet, not your couch."

Which isn't funny unless you accidently misread this sentence substituting the word "crotch" for "couch". Which makes it funnier.

Parade magazine has released its annual “What America Eats” survey, revealing some fascinating statistics, including:

  • Twenty-three percent of Americans pay no attention to nutritional facts and figures.
  • Just short of 60 percent of US residents are aware of but do not follow the USDA Food Pyramid.
  • Only 26 percent are aware that the Pyramid was revised in January.
  • About 84 percent say they try to eat a well-balanced diet but mostly fail; 42 percent eat a healthy mix of foods, “yet undermine their efforts by indulging in snacks and other pleasure foods as a reward.”
  • Eighty percent of Americans say it needs to be addressed by food companies, and 71 percent say it needs to be addressed by the government. Yet nearly half of parents say their own kids’ weight is just fine, and only 25 percent of adults are on diets to lose weight.
  • About 34 percent of Americans prefer to dine out or have their holiday meals catered in rather than prepare a big feast.
  • Roughly 78 percent of Americans prefer pizza as top take-out choice.
  • Eliminating an entire food group, such as cutting carbs or fats, is considered unhealthy by a majority of Americans (76 percent).
  • Forty-four percent of Americans brown-bag it for lunch.
  • Women in the US still do the bulk of the cooking, with 63 percent saying they do “everything” to prepare meals during the week.
  • Many more women than men are on diets (32.9 percent vs. 16.4 percent). Women would like to lose an average of 49.6 pounds; men, an average of 37 pounds.
  • About 45 percent of households prepare different dinners on the same night at least once a week or more.
  • About 21 percent eat cereal for dinner 2+ times per week.
  • 36 percent eat fast food, quick serve or casual dining meals because there isn’t enough time to prepare dinner every night of the week.

Good point, NPR

I found this point made on NPR quite smart and something I'd never considered. There's a discussion about tax rates, the AMT, revamping the system, etc.

Someone making $100,000 in San Francisco is lower middle class. Someone making $100,000 in Des Moines is upper middle class. But for federal taxes, they are in the same tax bracket. Why is cost of living and class you fall in for your area not taken into consideration in the tax code?

I say yes. I like this idea. Why I hadn't ranted about this prior to NPR bringing up the idea, I don't know.

How many points do you have?

You may know I'm obsessed w/ frequent flyer miles. But on NWA, I always have problems tracking my promotions status (aka free miles) w/ NWA. I finally navigated to the page that give you this info on - why it's hidden and I struggle to find it is beyond me. But here is the link to NWA promotions status page - I have 93 points so far and believe I'm on pace to hit 150?

Monday, November 14, 2005

If Match said I was a match, I'd ask for a refund

Through a series of strange (but not unfortunate) events, I ended up cruising (the Gays are rubbing off on me -- hehe PlanetDan joke) for Denver tonight looking for a guy I know.

QUICK PS - From her on, I'll try to say "I know a person/guy/woman who..." rather than "I have a friend who..." when the people I'm referring to are not real friends (read: their number is not in my phone, that's what defines friendship).

So while cruising, I found that a couple of boys have jumped the gun on the Holiday season. I thought it was bad when Target started putting up xmas trees on October 10, but seriously guys - do not create a holiday themed login name in October - wait till after Thanksgiving but plan to have found your match by Dec 26 because otherwise you'll be dated and that will make you unattractive to the ladies.

And, when you ask your friend with the nice digital camera to take your pix for while you take off your shirt and pose wearing [only?] a Santa hat, remember - associating any season with your picture will require constant updates that could become quite formidable. Ooh, and question why your good friend w/ said digital camera didn't slap you upside the head and tell you to knock it off, stand on the deck wearing a t-shirt and get your profile setup in a less idiotic fashion.

What kinds of girls will be "winking" at these two? I can only imagine. As my grandma would say, "It takes all kinds". I don't think that by "all kinds" she meant references in Mr. P. Santa's profile to what it takes to count to 12...

Sorry to offend but I couldn't make this up if I tried...



(I've Been) Hangin' Around

with Terrell Owens

I do believe that Counting Crows reference plus website dedicated to T.O. = my Christmas present to Heidi.

Happy Holidays, Heidi!

PS We had a târ-rel vs. tur-rel conversation at work last week. While I understand that looking at the name doesn't tell you the correct pronunciation, I'd have thought that having him in the news thousands of times each football season would help you learn the correct way to say tur-rel Owens' name.

Today's Cole Poll

Insiders leaking secret info
Stands to reason: 31.5 %
Grounds for treason: 68.5 %

I know you have an iPod

but that doesn't mean you know all the tricks. I've had problems occasionally with album info not showing up when I rip a CD. Tonight when it happened I decided to troubleshoot. And no surprise, Apple is genius and there's an easy fix (from Apple's iTunes for Windows Hot Tips) and again, Apple made me happy. Plus I'm eating an apple while bloggin about Apple. The coincidences never end in my life.

  • My new Stevie Wonder - The Definitive Collection CD
  • Learning Kelly Clarkson is the new Cher (potentially - but she'll need a "if I could turn back t-i-i-i-i-m-e" for the Gays to emulate)
  • Getting to see 5/5 of the people I wanted to in NY w/ very little prior planning - Kerry, Michael, Glenn, Rob, and Kris (and Missy, duh)
  • Finding out there's a Transit Museum in NYC
  • Finding Harpoon Winter Warmer on tap and having 2 pints and introducing Rob, Missy, and Kerry to the most wonderful beer honoring the most wonderful time of the year


  • Getting up at 3:30am so I'm ready for my SuperShuttle to pick me up between 3:45am and 4:00am and not getting in the shuttle till 4:35am -- and then having him say he thought it was Morningside Drive not Morningside Avenue after I specifically made a HUGE deal about AVENUE (NOT DRIVE) 3 separate times when on the phone w/ the company
  • Having the cabbie in MSP bitch that I was only going to Eagan - a okay-ish fare mind you - and then rounding up my $16.05 to $17 and looking at me as though I hadn't bothered to tip him when I gave him $19
  • Having to put the Transit Museum on my To Do list for next time because it didn't happen yesterday
  • Only having 1 pint of Yuengling the whole weekend b/c it was NEVER available at the bars we were at
  • Not have the foresight to buy cases of beer w/out distribution in MN to bring home w/ me ala Honeyweis Green Bay - Boston via plane or Yuengling PA - MA via John's truck

My lawyer emailed today...

Good news! Your case settled today at mediation. It will take about one month to get the paper work wrapped up, but there will be no trial. So, you don't have to keep those dates in December open. Once I get all the final paper work, I will send a copy to you. Give me a call if you have any questions. Otherwise, I will be in touch when everything is done.

Yipee! Yahoo! Hurray! Hallelujah! NO TRIAL!

However, a bit sad I don't get to experience the legal system one step further with minimal consequences to me. Oh well..

Guesses are currently being accepted as to the amount of $ my insurance company is shelling out to the old people. I was being sued for $50K each - comment your guess.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

You probably already are on the DL as in distribution list

If you like Planet Dan, you'll like Aaron Karo.

I went to his website which is really been spiffied up lately to search for his "bar close is too late in NYC and makes going to work the next day impossible" article but can't find it because 1) it didn't find a decent search and 2) only articles 26 forward are on the web b/c the rest have been published.

As I was cruising, I found a rumination from last year about people getting engaged. On point, considering I have 5 friends getting married next year (but surprisingly, no one has gotten engaged since Amy in September - but I bet Q4 is HUGE for engagements so who knows...).

Then the point about slow walkers and toddlers which which I SO agree w/ esp. as Missy and I shopped on 5th Avenue the last 2 days. And the theory that hot girls are attend bad basketball games. So funny.

To do: waste time at work "reviewing" issues 26 forward from Aaron Karo.
To do: read this transcript of an Aaron Karo stand-up show in Florida from last year.

The West Side IS the best side

Since Star Magazine did a "where are they now" on the stars of the movie The Outsiders, I have Netflixed The Outsiders and am now reading the book. I'm quite sure I read the book for the first and only time in 1995 (I'm feeling old - I was a soph in HS 10 YEARS ago?).

My memories from Mr. Schmidt's English class was that I read the book in one sit down of about 3 hours. Since my HS doesn't have options like White Bear Lake (Bayside) for taking AP English vs. Dick&Jane English, I vividly recall boys (maybe girls too?) s-t-r-u-g-g-l-i-n-g to make it through the novel (perhaps novella - it's quite short?). 16 year olds that can't read at a 6th grade level - gotta love it.

After this book, we read the Hounds of Baskerville (Sherlock Holmes) and then Of Mice and Men and for the love of god, I swore I had to graduate and move to Mpls ASAP when I couldn't walk to my locker without hearing everyone in my class talk like Lennie while holding pretend pet mice in their pockets. I'm assuming HS boys everywhere suck and do this and not just in J-town?

Back to subject - The Outsiders... I'm reading the book and start thinking about Greasers vs. Socs and Ponyboy is explaining the Socs live on the West Side of town w/ Greasers on the East Side. And probably b/c I was on my way to Manhattan I realized the West Side is the "best side*" of the park.

* By "best side" I just mean that in general, you would find more Socs than Greasers in this part of town. And society generally says this is the "good" part of town. It does not mean I think it is the "best" part of town.

And the western suburbs (Minnetonka-ish) is the best side of Mpls.
And the western suburbs (Westborough, Natick, Newton, Brookline) is the best side of Boston.
And West County is the best side of St. Louis.
And the western suburbs (Waukesha-ish) is the best side of Milwaukee.
And the west end of Jackson is where all the big fancy houses are - out by the Baptist church.

And is this the case everywhere??? And why???

Aside from la above listed examples, I've been scrubbing my list of city knowledge looking for more examples and counter examples. So far I've got my list of best sides:

Chicago - North and West Suburbs
Rapid City - West Side of town
LA - ok this is hard but the Inland Empire is icky and East, and the beach town are West so is the West Side the best side? Zip please advise.
Seattle - Northish perhaps - Redmond is North
London - West (Kensington)
Bay Area - San Francisco is not in the East Bay so SF is the best side and the west side?
DC - NW quadrant is the best - SE by FAR the worst
Miami - East side w/ South Beach I think
Springfield, MA - South side
Austin - perhaps the North side of the Capitol is where 6th/7th street is?
Philadelphia - I think the Northern suburbs
Atlanta - North Side

And for having been to 35 states and probably 15 countries, these are all the cities I can recall... I would LOVE comments about this b/c I seriously think there must be a reason the west is apparently the best.

For the love...

On Friday, someone Yahoo Searched these three words (it's really funny - click on the link - but not you, mom) and from this search, visited my blog. I can only imagine he's planning a bachelor party to the Dells? And has a pickup and half or maybe a full gun rack.

According to my calculations...

I will end up 228 miles short of making NWA Silver Elite this year. NOT happy about that, especially because I track these types of things and am generally WAY on top of this stuff.

It blew my mind I'm this close but it's triple miles to Las Vegas that's making it happen. If I'd realized this earlier, I'd have bought a $250 ticket on NWA for this weekend's flight to NYC instead of trading in miles for a free one. Perhaps I need to fly somewhere in the next 45 days?

I know Alicia's rationale will be similar to her thoughts on the espresso machine "deal" but I truly do see value in Silver Elite - as in upgrades on empyish flight which are exactly the types I fly for work. And getting to sit w/ Alicia in the front part of the plane in priority seating when we fly together. And priority boarding so my bags don't have to get checked. And a fancy Silver Elite card I get to sport in my wallet.

F me, 228 miles short.


If I were smart, I'd wait a few weeks before publishing this riddle. But I'm impatient, so here goes:

Whom of my college friends has a first and last name where both words are last names of men who have run or have been rumored to be running for President of Estados Unitos (that's USA for those of you who don't habla Espanol)?

Word of the Day

Shout out to the future Dr. Kerry Wild.
PS I spelled epidemiology right without any help from my 'puter.

My relatives are BIG and I mean big winners

On a scale from one to my relatives on my dad's side all weigh over 200 big ones (including the women), I have large relatives.

However, they are big winners - my hometown newspaper has an annual contest when football/chili/Cheeto season comes around where you "guess" the scores of 18 football games - HS, college, and pro. You just "guess" the winner of each game, and give the score of the "game of the week" as the tiebreaker if needed. At the end of 10 weeks, he/she with the most correct "guesses" wins tickets to a Vikings game.

This year, my grandpa won the tickets. Of those mentioned in the Jackson County Pilot article annoucing the winner, 5 are my relatives:
1. Grandpa
2. Grandma
3. Aunt
6. Uncle
Getting 17 correct in week 10: second cousin

Since I learned to read 20 years ago, I'd say 12/20 years one of my relatives has won the Vikings tickets. I shit you not. How do they "guess" so g.d. accurately when my fantasy football team is 3-6???????

I f-ing love small towns. Not.

PS For some reason, my dad does not partake in the game, though his parents and both siblings placed 1-3, 6. Probably for the same reason our family pronounces our last name differently than everyone we're related to: my mom is the reason.

Bedtime: 4am

While I bitched incessantly about bar close in Minnesota being 1am when I was in college, I think I really liked it. Say you go out at 10pm for "a beer". Worst case, you're in bed at 1:30am. Sleeping. Same scenario except you start happy hour at 4:30pm. Worst case - 6.5 hours of drinking.

I'm sure Aaron Karo has ruminated about this, but I think it would be f-ing impossible to live in NYC b/c of bar time. Same scenario - happy hour or "a beer" all of a sudden you get back to your icky sketchy NY apt and it's f-ing 4am.

My reason for being snappy about this today:

arrive EWR at 9:45pm
arrive Midtown 11pm
enter bar at midnight
bedtime 4:15am

arrive in line at party 8:20pm
get into party 9pm
go to club 11pm
go get pizza 2:45am
bedtime 3:45am

dinner 8pm
meet up w/ Rob for "a couple of drinks" 10:15pm
second bar that had the strangest mix of people ever 11:30pm
bedtime 4am

It's ridiculous. I swear to you if I make it past 11pm tonight I'll be impressed with myself (I'll blog about my bedtime tonight for your viewing pleasure)

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Doing the NYC

Missy and I are having fun in NY. At a bar on Thursday, we met "security personnel" (guards) from a prision, who moonlight as security at Best Buy in Midtown.

Friday we had Pret, shopped, and went to the Top of the Rock (Rockefeller Center). It was awesome - better than the Empire State Building experience b/c better view of the park and hardly any people there (just opened 2 wks ago).

Friday night we went out to the Out 100 awards w/ Michael and Glenn. Free drinks till 11 then they were $10 each. Awesome. Went dancing, and then had Crispy Pizza.

Learned my sister actually really lives in Harlem, not Upper Upper Manhattan. When the cabbie dropped us off (after 3 cabs told us 118th was too far and wouldn't take us) he warned us to be very very careful and watched to make sure we got in the building. We proceeded to drink 24oz Coors Lights as we walked to the train, on the train, and in line for the Out 100 party. Which we never thought twice about but in hindsight, was not normally accepted behavior.

We are now headed to a cute coffee shop in Harlem for brunch. Then shopping. Maybe Canal Street? Dinner w/ Michael, Glenn, Kerry and maybe Jeff - Little Italy. Yipee.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Makes sense

In a unanimous decision that was its first since the installation of Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr., the US Supreme Court ruled that companies must pay employees not just for the time it takes for them to put on protective clothing and gear before working, but also for the time it takes for them to walk from the place where they don the garb to the place where they work.

Where were these people working where they WEREN'T getting paid for this time? It makes sense to me that you would get paid.

But I also think it's funny when I'm told I'll get "paid training". I'm always like, no shit, you think I'm going to volunteer to go unpaid for required training? I just assume required work things are paid, but then again I don't work for an hourly wage so I guess I just don't understand.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

I say "Bitch Please!" instead...

Is it PC for me to find this funny? From an article in the Tribune about the N word:

After Kanye West commented on national TV that President Bush doesn't like black people, the University of Florida student newspaper ran an editorial cartoon in which West was holding up a placard marked "The Race Card" and Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was scolding him with the words, "Nigga Please!"

I do not think that BPs use the N word.

It won't stop...

After going to approximately 3 movies in theatres so far this year, movie season is coming on strong. After Alicia's Best Movie Week Ever (HP4 and Rent), it's quickly followed up by The Chronicles of Narnia (Dec 9) and Memoirs of a Geisha.


Have you ever heard of Michiana? Here it is:

"Michiana is the common name given to the area of Northern Indiana and Southwest Lower Michigan which comprises 11 counties , the core being La Porte, St. Joseph, Elkhart and Marshall (in Indiana) and Berrien (in Michigan. The main towns are South Bend, Mishawaka and Elkhart (in Indiana) and Niles (in Michigan), all of which lie along the St. Joseph River, which winds it's way through the area to it's mouth in Lake Michigan to the north."

Who knew this existed? Good trivia to remember.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Madonna Now

I'm not quite as excited as Michael and Marc for the new album to break from Madonna next week. However, I think it's cool that you can listen to the whole damn album for free right now at's Hear Music First site. It looks like there's security so you can't download it, but you can listen as much as you can in the next 6 days till the album is out.

Out like the Out! Party I'm going to on Friday night with Michael and Missy. My last minute NYC trip is planned and I'm stoked to get back to the East Coast!

As a noun?

I can define the word intimate. That's why it's not the word of the day.

But did you know it can be used as a noun:

n. A close friend or confidant.

I guess it makes sense but I hadn't run across it used that way. I guess I can give up on today - I learned my one new thing already and it's not even 10am.

Monday, November 07, 2005

A convertible moment

When I was younger, I would have moments when I figured out why certain things were named what they were - "ding" it made sense in my head. Examples:

Convertible - cars that are convertible from topped to topless

Target (stores or shooting practice goal) - the target you aim for whether shopping or shooting

I just realized right now why medals are called medals - they are made of metal. Something normal people figured out years ago...

Run Forest, Run

I'm not all that familiar with Forest Whitaker but I enjoyed his performance in the Panic Room and Good Morning Vietnam. I did not realize he's also a director - specifically of Hope Floats and Waiting to Exhale. Who knew he directs chick flicks?

PS I spoke with someone lately who LOVES Hope Floats and it was funny to me - I don't hate the movie but didn't realize there were people who LOVED it.

To buy: Yummy Soup

I tried this line of soup for the first time tonight and I'm very excited it's SO good, especially this flavor. I'd be happier if it came in a different container - the soft box doesn't quite do it for me...

I'm going to try all the other kinds too before the slow selling flavors get discontinued and are lost and gone forever.

Easiest $25 you can make

Alicia - you'll love this.

Help this man name his baby. The guidelines on baby name suggestions are posted.

Slow Monday?

Take some time to read through this oldish but good report that Harrah's casino published in 2004 profiling gamblers vs. non-gamblers, how they'll vote in Pres. elections (that's the "old" part but still interesting) and where they're from and how often they travel.

Kerry - your insight into their methodology is always appreciated :)

Free subs

It looks like this is just a MN thing, but for all you here...

Donate a blanket to your local Subway store on Sunday, November 13 and get a free 6 inch sub.

You don't even have to dress up like a Subway sandwich to get the freebie...

How much coke can one person take?

Not unlike Regular and Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, Coke is now coming out with fancy, complicated concoctions (sp?) next year in Regular and Diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke. Last winter I blogged about the complicated Dr. Pepper line extensions - I'm hoping since I liked Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, I'll also like the new Black Cherry Vanilla Coke.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Package of the year

My dad will be pleased that his favorite new liquor store find just won an award. The new aluminum bottles from Budweiser won Packaging of the Year.

Word of the Day


Happy anniversary to me

My first posting was one year ago with this posting about Upsnap. Happy anniversary, Laura's Blog!

Friday, November 04, 2005


Fast Food Nation is being turned into a movie. Yeah!

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Happy Birthday

Nelly, 31

I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it

Idaho passes a law regarding Napoleon Dynamite.

Planet Dan as Prince at Halloween pictures - and all the pictures from his party are frickin fabulous - while I boycotted Halloween this year, I think it would be fun to have a big party with people who all got good costumes for the holiday.

Contrary to the title

the Optomistic Insight blog is quite depressing.

If you REALLY like babies or pets...

you'll love these customized checks you can design using photographs you submit to the company.

1) Recommend these to the people you work with that show you 28 pictures of their baby wearing the Halloween costume.

2) Who uses checks anymore???

Sucks like a Hoover

With the upcoming trip to Vegas, I started thinking about what to do on day 4 of the trip - that's when the machines have been beeping too much and you start to go crazy and can't wait to get the hell out. In order to avoid this craziness and things that could occur during this day (might think Scientology is a good idea, might use the rest of my available credit limit to place $ on one number in roulette, etc.) I'm researching taking a day trip to Hoover Dam.

Things I didn't know about Hoover Dam:

It's only 30 miles from Vegas.
It's right by Arizona.
It's right by the Grand Canyon (ok maybe I knew there was a correlation between the Dam/Lake Mead/the Colorado River, maybe?)

If I have my way, I'll get to visit 1) the Dam 2) Arizona, a state I've never set foot in and 3) The Grand Canyon (which must be one of the wonders of the world?) in the next month.

Ooh - another thing I didn't know - one the advertised "best bus tour of the Hoover Dam" they have the only "5 star diamond" tour and offer.........


Wow, Pizza Hut is very VIP - who knew?

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Trial dates: Dec 20-23

Not sure if I blogged about the fact that I'm getting sued for a 12/01 car accident (I did blog about my deposition), but I am. Apparently the negotiations between the old f-ers suing me, their lawyer, and my lawyer went less than perfect this week b/c my lawyer emailed me to keep the trial dates open in my calendar - it's not cancelled yet.

Awesome. One more fun way for me to potentially experience the legal system without having to be fully invested in the outcome (my car insurance company is liable for everything).

To be continued...

Fun story that happened to me tonight:

Pre-story info to know: Instead of pulling a ticket at the MSP airport, you just scan your credit card when you get there and leave and it charges your credit card for your parking fee...

So I land in MSP from St. Louis. Prior to getting off the plane, I take my keys out of my bag and put my corporate AmEx in my pocket so I can pay for parking when I get out of the lot. I walk down the terminal, over to the tram, and take it to Red level 4. Put my bags in the car and then pull my credit card out of my pocket so I'm ready to go.

OOOOH wait - I didn't pull out my credit card b/c it wasn't there. F -- I look through my bags knowing that it's certainly not in my bags but instead missing from my pocket - I get out of my car like I'm going to trapse backwards through the whole airport and then realize who knows where my card might be within the massive, MSP - one of the 20 busiest airports in the world.

Good news: I drive out to one of the parking lot attendants, a Medicare aged woman who can look up when a credit card bearing my name scanned into the lot (Monday at 9:08am) and I can pay for my parking without the credit card I used when entering the log.

Bad news: No clue where my month old corporate AmEx is. If it's not turned in at the airport, I'll have to cancel it (annoying and makes me feel VERY blonde). I have to buy a $300 plane ticket this week, as well as a $300ish digital camera and $100ish jump drive. And leave for my next business trip in less than 2 weeks. And I won't have a replacement card for who knows how long.

Nice work Laura - way to plan ahead before getting off the plane. Last time I "plan ahead" bytches.

UPDATE: I called the airport lost and found and they didn't have anything there. So I called AmEx to cancel - they knew my card had been lost at the airport and it had already been cancelled and a new one will be delivered at no charge to me by 3pm tomorrow. Good service, AmEx.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Word of the Day


Stories of actually using this word may result in payment of $1.

Chicks dig mopeds

Gopher FB Guard Mark Setterstrom (who is the "owner of a workmanlike attitude who is strictly business on the field") put it best when he made the statement above about what chicks dig. The picture in my head of 2 men the size of Darrell Reid on one moped makes me giggle. The full story talking about the Gopher Football Team moped posse is from the Trib.

On a related Gopher FB note, the Tribune says the Gophers upcoming opponents in Indiana, Michigan State, and Iowa are "tricky but beatable". Um, have you seen them fall apart lately??? I wonder if they also considered Ohio State tricky but beatable?

Finally, your response to today's poll question is requested:

Would you rather have the Gophers not make a bowl game, or make the gay Gaylord Music City Bowl again?